An Open Letter to My Son With Addiction by Ron Grover Partnership to End Addiction

Outline a specific example of their and how it affected you. A second pair of eyes may detect words or phrases that could be read as angry or accusatory. When feelings run high, it becomes impossible to come up with the best things to speak. It takes courage and dedication to face someone whose addictive behaviors have caused you pain or concern. If there are any concerns about content we have published, please reach out to us at


You still are not willing to be 100% honest with anyone but, see the “anyones” don’t count. Only you count and oddly enough, when I want you to think and focus on yourself, you see that as selfish. What a sorry lot we alcoholics are when we can’t find our way. We only make sense to another alcoholic which is why as annoyed as I am at you, I still “get it”.

Intervention Letters: What to Say to Your Loved One

If you have previously been enabling addiction or providing a little too much sympathy for a disease in need of treatment, use this section to set boundaries. Explain what you will and won’t continue to do, like ceasing to provide housing if sobriety isn’t maintained or cutting off financial support until treatment is completed. In preparing your letter, think about the ways in which facing addiction has changed your life and the life of your loved one. All of these things may seem par for the course for those in active addiction but will stand out as red flags to those on the outside looking in. It’s okay to be as open and honest as you’d like and feel free to explain specific traits or moments that exemplify your feelings. Be sure to specify that your love is unconditional.

When we were first married we both liked to party. I still like to go out and have a good time but the alcohol does not control me. I seldom drink at home because of my children. My wife and I have been married 12 years and have two children, ages seven and three.

Tips for Writing a Great Intervention Letter

In your case, you may be able to encourage your wife to enter treatment without making any threats. And during treatment you may be able to prove to her that you care about her as much as ever. If it’s done right, when treatment is over, she will have a better relationship with those who joined the intervention than she had with them before it happened. She tells me that we cannot go out together because we do not have enough money. Then she will go out and spend $50 or more at a bar.

I have seen first hand the a letter to an alcoholic with which each individual is treated at this North County San Diego treatment facility. The facility is in a beautiful upscale location and is well maintained and operated with care. I had the privilege of working for Mark and Amy during the summer. I’ll never forget their kindness and compassion for myself and their clients.

A Letter for Families to Use with An Addicted Family Member

Your efforts will only make her angry, and she may try to find someone else who will support her dependency. An intervention has proven to be one of the best and most effective ways of delivering help, and it may be your only reasonable option. The down-side of an intervention can be resentment.

  • You wouldn’t be angry with me for having cancer or diabetes.
  • With addiction, at least, their thoughtless behavior is attributed to their being out of control.
  • Many days and nights are spent worrying if you are hurt or in the hospital or in jail.
  • I will no longer allow you to rob me of who I truly am or create unnecessary chaos in my life.
  • Or else I try to make a lot of noise in the laundry room so you know I’m coming, and you can hide the alcohol.
  • Your other choice is for me to stop enabling your addiction by changing my number and refusing to house you or support your addiction in any manner.

You encouraged me and supported me in my career aspirations. This gave me the confidence I needed to accept job positions that took me throughout the Midwest on my own. When I was told by my therapist (she may be a counselor, I don’t really know) that this was the next thing I had to do while in treatment, I understood but I asked some questions. She told me that I should just write it from the heart.

Preparing for the Intervention

In closing, I want to share a powerful experience I had recently. I was called to a prominent university hospital to facilitate an intervention at a woman’s bedside. This successful female entrepreneur was suffering from cirrhosis, and had recently experienced complete liver failure. Yet she would not accept the need for treatment and recovery. Her doctors were not willing to put her on the list for a liver transplant, because she would not deal with her alcoholism.

  • Hurt is the same for those with addiction as it is for those without.
  • Start now to learn, to understand, and to plan for my recovery.
  • This website is for informational purposes only.
  • A good test of whether or not you are an alcoholic is to ask yourself, am I willing to stop drinking entirely if it would make my spouse feel more comfortable?
  • We are 100% on your side and will do whatever it takes to understand you and help you through this difficult time.
  • You will be treated with dignity and respect and you will have the freedom to make choices.

My cousin, a missionary, took it to Malaysia with him and shared it there. Another friend read it at a Bible study in Russia. Twelve-step groups like Alcoholics Anonymous say you must undergo a “spiritual awakening” to change your life.

I hope that God’s will for you is to be a contributing, sober, happy, peaceful member of society. I hope that it is God’s will for you to keep your family intact. I can only pray for God’s will and this is one of those times when I hope to God that His will is my hope.

What happens when you drink alcohol everyday?

Over time, excessive alcohol use can lead to the development of chronic diseases and other serious problems including: High blood pressure, heart disease, stroke, liver disease, and digestive problems. Cancer of the breast, mouth, throat, esophagus, voice box, liver, colon, and rectum.

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